date nights

movie-date-night

 

I’m sure this looks familiar, especially if you’re a parent. We have been terribly guilty of not making time for date nights in the past two years, and we’re making it a priority this year (and all years going forward, for that matter). We’ve been married for five, together for seven…and ok, maybe “the itch” is a real thing. As parents of twins, each year gets a bit easier as far as making time for ourselves and our marriage, but it’s still very difficult. It is a topic I’ve avoided discussing here, until now. The health + wellness of my relationship is of utmost importance to me, and I feel that journaling it here (as transparently as possible), will be cathartic + nurturing. Our goal is (at least) one date night a month, even if it’s a creative at-home date, like this one. We’ll be documenting them here in an effort to stay on track, and (hopefully) inspire others. Keeping romance alive in any long-term relationship takes work – what have you done to cultivate yours? Please share!

Notes

  1. LOVE this!

    We started doing day dates during the week in the last year or so.

    Our tot is in school M/W/F so we go to lunch or a museum or a movie. Since we both work for ourselves, we work that night after she’s asleep. We figure we’re already paying for childcare so we try to do double duty once or so a month.

    We’re also in a babysitting co-op with 25 other families….it’s transformative.

    Enjoy the evening! xx.

    • thank you Julie! love the day date idea – we might also be doing a few of those (our schedule is similar, although I’m the only one self-employed). a babysitting co-op?! that does sound transformative! xx

  2. What a great idea!! We have twin 2 year olds as well and we went on our first date night in January (last one was in June)!! We are trying as well to make more time for each other and not totally lose ourselves in just being parents.

    I look forward to your updates!!

    Corrina

    • well hello Corrina, yes it’s so tough!! thanks for following along + chiming in…I truly appreciate it!

  3. We started a good habit some years ago : going to a restaurant once a month even when the children were babies (thanks to our babysitters!)
    But the real pleasure was to go on travelling. Even just a week a year as a couple is sooo good! Now we’ve been married for 21 years and I still enjoy it when we are together!
    Don’t stop keeping time for you two but also for YOU; this is the secret of a happy mother, wife and woman!

    • oh wow – a trip together without the kids (even for a night) would be amazing…hasn’t been possible yet due to childcare issues. we’ve both been able to travel individually thankfully, but we could use a getaway together!

      absolutely…I’m a better wife, mother, and woman with time for ME. xo

  4. Yes yes yes! Such a good reminder. Since you both are such romantic soul mates, I’m sure this strengthened effort will be a success this year :)

    I feel related to this even as one without kids…it seems that every year that goes by gets busier! Work/extracurricular activities/winter SADS (hello!) have definitely played their role in distracting me from dialing in to our relationship. Some days I find myself coming home from work, calling “hello!” to my husband (working in the living) and not even making eye contact with him for a good 5-10 minutes… which I’ve realized is just a tad rude, ha. When we can’t go out for romantic-dinner-type dates, we tend to run errands together, which is way more fun than going alone. Although, we do tend to spend more $$ at the grocery store when that happens ;) We are also starting to read and discuss a book together.. we’ll see how long we can keep it up!

    • aw, thank you Angie…I have to agree with you there. ;)

      we can absolutely all relate to getting caught up in life – plus you’ve had a lot going on lately (moving, reno, etc.) so that is a big part of it I’m sure. sharing a book is a cool idea – just have to get Parker to read, LOL. xoxo

  5. It absolutely sounds familiar! I only have one 2 year old (also a Henry – what a great name!). I have no tips right now, but wanted to comment and acknowledge that it sounds super common and I want to have accountability to work on my own relationship with my husband. I try to give him a big hug daily, and remember to do nice things for each other and acknowledge and thank him for the things he does for our little boy and for us and vice versa. We are both exhausted after working crazy hours and finding quality time with our boy, but it’s good to put ourselves first sometimes too – to be good role models for our son for strong relationships and to be better parents and a team.

    • thank you for your thoughts Marissa…and yes, absolutely – putting ourselves and our marriages first is beneficial to our children. (love that you have a Henry too – such a great name)!

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